are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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