She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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