let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
