so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
