i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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