oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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