So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
