Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
