Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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