So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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