Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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