So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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