I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Every concussion has its silver lining
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
