Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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