i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
