I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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