If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
