wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Another day, another engagement, another cat
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
