fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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