I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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