How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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