when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Randomize
