brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I want to walk on stilts...naked
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
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Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
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