You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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