Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
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ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
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Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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