we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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