Who did Billy Mays play for?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
