i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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