She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
