Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
