My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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