I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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