Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize