We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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