You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
