ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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