My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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