He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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