I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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