I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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