Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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