Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
