I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize