fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
