no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
