OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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