He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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