did you get engaged???
the condom got lost in my hair
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I fill condoms, not promises.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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