Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"