Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize